So what do you think my odds are of squeezing my tushy into a Thomas the Tank Engine costume?
It's sort of a one size fits all apron kind of deal. I've always had my doubts about the one size fits all racket. Once when I was pregnant with the News Anchor (Matthew's latest obsession--he does the nightly news with Spencer, his oblivious co-anchor, at his side and the NBC peacock taped to the wall with painters tape) I purchased a lovely polyester blend nightgown from Walmart. By the time I had the Little Lady the same gown barely fit, so no, I don't believe the one size fits all lie. Regardless, I'm up a creek without a paddle.
My fondest dream came true. I was actually invited to a social event that doesn't require me to bring a diaper bag, although who am I kidding, Little Lady will be coming with. One of our friends invited Corbin and I to a grown up Halloween party. I almost felt popular again. My party days have really wained since I left DC. I suppose that holds true for all of my fellow party goers as well since time and money were on our side back then. My party dishes cry from neglect most nights but I kiss them and tell them someday we'll be together again, this is just a temporary separation.
I was all excited until I read (yes, it actually was a bona fide invitation) the part about coming in costume. My heart sank. I must confess I'm not a lover of all things costume. In fact I could almost use the word "hate" but that's probably a tad strong. Would it be inappropriate to don my Walmart one size fits all lie and go as a pregnant lady? Well, I have to figure this out quickly and my creative juices are drunk right now. I don't have a clue what to show up in and it's an anxiety producing experience. And what in the world will Corbin wear? Do we go as a unit--like a Captain and Tenille type duo--or be our own person? What about buying a costume or digging something up that we don't wear anymore? Corbin just got rid of his Boy Scout shirt that stretched the buttons to ultracapacity upon dressing. I suppose I should have let him keep it like he wanted. I could go as an 80's chick because I probably still have the real life clothes. I still have my slippers from the 8th grade so I'm sure I have a pair of bright green preppy pants with a pink polo somewhere but those weren't one size fits all and I'm not that one size anymore.
I can tell this is going to take some doing.
2 comments:
I feel the same way about dressing up. Have you considered getting (or sewing) some blue vests and going as Wal Mart greeters? Would be simple...if you had a vest.
My husband and I put our tacky honeymoon souvenirs to use. We don our Hawaiian gear, strap a camera our our necks, and become tourists. Pretty lame, I konw.
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